UterUS, not UterYOU

I discovered a few specific things about being a woman. So I thought I'd share. Our two major hormones are Estrogen and Progesterone. FSH is Follicle Stimulating Hormone: FSH stimulates one of the follicles in our ovary to mature to ovulation and start putting out its own estrogen and progesterone. LH is Leutenizing Hormone: LH causes the follicle to actually ovulate and go into the oviduct (beginning of the fallopian tubes) when it surges up.

The major BC pills/patches/rings/etc do one of two things: put out higher (middling) levels of both estrogen AND progesterone because that inhibits our hypothalamus from putting out hormones (GnRH=Gonadotropin Releasing Hormone) that cause us to eventually ovulate by telling the Anterior Pituitary to send out LH and FSH; OR they (like the Mirena IUD) put out no estrogen and high levels of progesterone, which inhibits the anterior pituitary from putting out FSH and LH - thus no ovulation either.

Please note that during pregnancy, your body is producing mid-levels of both estrogen and progesterone (first from the corpeus luteum, which is what forms of the leftover follicle spot the egg came out of in the ovary, and then from the fetus itself) because mid-levels will also keep your lining thick and lustrous to better support a baby... and remember that this also keeps any other follicle from maturing to ovulation, since you only want one at a time.

So when you take pills that also put out mid-levels of estrogen/progesterone, they are imitating the state of pregnancy, keeping you from ovulating at all. So it's not really bad for you - studies have shown that women who have had children/been on BC have lower incidence of ovarian/uterine cancers than those who have not. And when you have your off week, the levels of Estrogen and Progesterone drop suddenly and that naturally causes you to shed your lining.

IUD's work entirely differently (assuming you have a copper IUD and not the Mirena). The copper IUD's have no hormones - they work solely mechanically. Basically, because of the copper itself and the presence of this object in the uterus, it creates an inhospitable environment for sperm. They are unable to remain viable if they even reach the uterus - and reaching the uterus is trickier since the IUD causes thickening of the mucus at the cervix. Frankly, no one seems to know exactly why it works, only that it does work. This site has a lot of frank and interesting information on the IUD.

The MonkeySphere

I have discovered a theory that explains the whole entire world society as we know it:

What do monkeys have to do with war, oppression, crime, racism and even e-mail spam?

You'll see that all of the random ass-headed cruelty of the world will suddenly make perfect sense once we go...

Twelve Steps to Total Enlightenment

What the hell is this about?

According to the research and this brilliantly snarky and intelligent article, we are physically incapable of thinking of people as people in numbers higher than about 150. We just can't manage it. And this explains, well, everything. Religious wars. War in general. Hating on government/corporations/countries because they are anonymous blobs of people.

So unless I know you, screw you - you're outside my monkeysphere! Go monkey around elsewhere!*



*Not really. I am supremely grateful to your monkeyness for reading my monkey blog. :)